The Karp Report

By Franklin Karp
Published on: October 11, 2019

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Schmaltz & Sex

An Italian man said, “Last week, my wife and I had great sex. I rubbed her body all over with olive oil, we made passionate love, and she screamed for five full minutes at the end.”

The Frenchman boasted, “Last week when my wife and I had sex, I rubbed her body all over with butter. We then made passionate love and she screamed for fifteen minutes.”

The Jewish man said, “Well, last week my wife and I also had sex. I rubbed her body all over with schmaltz (chicken fat). We made love, and she screamed for over six hours.”

The other two were stunned. The amazed Frenchman asked, “What could you have possibly done to make your wife scream for over six hours?”

The Jewish man said, “I wiped my hands on the bedspread.”

Franklin Karp

Franklin Karp

Franklin is the COO for Audio Video Systems in Plainview, NY - one of the premier custom integration technology firms in the country. He was previously the CEO for Harvey Electronics, a leading hi-end consumer technology retail chain in the NYC area.

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