Being Liked

By Douglas Weinstein
Published on: March 30, 2018

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Everybody wants to be liked. Close your eyes for a second and think of the last time you met someone and walked away thinking, “boy, what a nice guy.” And that’s because they made a good first impression, as well as a good last impression. There are four simple traits you can learn and emulate in order to be that ‘nice guy’. Let’s explore them briefly:

First, people that we like rarely if ever play the power trip game. They don’t need to! They are comfortable in their own skin. They want to make a good first impression and put you at ease. This sets the stage for a comfortable, engaging conversation. So the next time you meet someone, relax, tilt your head towards them, smile, and let them know how honored you are to meet them.

Second, make sure you focus on learning as much about them, before you ever think about telling your own story. Imagine you meet someone and talk with them for 15 minutes. You walk away thinking, “What a great conversation.” It’s only later that you realize you did all the talking. You understand that they have mastered the art of getting you to talk about yourself.

Third, go into each and every new conversation thinking about what you can do for the other person. Remarkably likable people focus not on themselves, but on whom they are talking with.

And finally, make sure you tell your new acquaintance how honored you are to have met them. Make a good last impression. Instead of the old, ‘nice to meet you’, look them in the eye, smile and tell them, “It was really nice to meet you.” Be sincere. Be impressionable. Be liked.

 

Douglas Weinstein

Douglas Weinstein

Doug is the managing editor and co-founder of the Technology Insider Group. He is also the executive editor of the forthcoming Technology Designer Magazine, that debuts January 2019. Previously, he was the co-founder and Executive Director of the Elf Foundation, a non-profit organization that created Room of Magic entertainment theaters in children's hospitals across North America.

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