Doug lived all his life in the Florida Keys, is on his deathbed and knows the end is near. His nurse, his wife, his daughter and two sons are with him.
He asks for two witnesses to be present and a camcorder be in place to record his last wishes. And when all is ready he begins to speak:
“My son, Jack, I want you to take the Ocean Reef houses.”
“My daughter Sybil, you take the apartments between mile markers 100 and Tavernier.”
“My son, Jamie, I want you to take the offices over in the Marathon Government Center.”
“Sarah, my dear wife, please take all the residential buildings on the bayside on Blackwater Sound.”
The nurse and witnesses are blown away as they did not realize his extensive holdings, and as Doug slips away, the nurse says, “Mrs. Pender, your husband must have been such a hard-working man to have accumulated all this property.”
The wife replies, “The asshole had a paper route.”